I love that you shared about even the "victim" having some responsibility for the "toxic" ecosystem versus being the creator in it. (I'm sure you are referencing the Victim Triangle and have seen the exalted version with Creator, Challenger and Coach.)
Also, the word "toxic" is a funny one that I struggle with as it implies there is some way to be or somewhere to go...to thriving, harmony, etc...Systems are governed by purpose so it makes sense it just is a loaded word that I think brings in opportunities for shame spiral versus the nuance you write about. Maybe that is me being sensitive as someone who sees the value of a good challenge and even destruction.
I think it's important to recognise that some things we do, do harm us. Not everything is neutral and sometimes shame can have value! Although maybe not a shame spiral.
I love that you shared about even the "victim" having some responsibility for the "toxic" ecosystem versus being the creator in it. (I'm sure you are referencing the Victim Triangle and have seen the exalted version with Creator, Challenger and Coach.)
Also, the word "toxic" is a funny one that I struggle with as it implies there is some way to be or somewhere to go...to thriving, harmony, etc...Systems are governed by purpose so it makes sense it just is a loaded word that I think brings in opportunities for shame spiral versus the nuance you write about. Maybe that is me being sensitive as someone who sees the value of a good challenge and even destruction.
I think it's important to recognise that some things we do, do harm us. Not everything is neutral and sometimes shame can have value! Although maybe not a shame spiral.